If I Had Chosen Stefan
by Boogaloochoo2
Summary: Elena brings back her diary and explains her perspective in a brand new way! If she had stayed with Stefan!
1. Chapter 1

If I Had Chosen Stefan

At first is was a blur of emotions. I felt a very large connection with Stefan. I wanted to spend the rest of my human life with him even though he will still look the same for ever and see me as I slowly decay and leave this world while he is still living his life as a teenager. Yet I cannot deny that after my first kiss with Damon that I felt something but in my opinion I shouldn't be messing with such an evil and discusting creature as Damon is. I was completely upset when Stefan fell in love with someone else and that he moved to the countryside to live a human life as a mechanic. At the same time the thought of his presence never left my mind and as I fell into the trance of hate towards Damon and everyone telling me I loved while he was dead at the time. It was very hard to believe that a creature such as him self would think that I thought highly of him! All I know is that Stefan will always be the one that I love, that I protect. I am so relieved that Damon is dead for good I could never love him he wanted to bite into my neck the second he saw me. He is a hateful demon and I hope he burns in the fires of hell just like he deserves... TO BE CONTINUED


	2. Chapter 2

If I Had Chosen Stefan 2

Today more memories came back of Damon and I! I am completely disgusted in what I am remembering I mean I could have never loved him! I think Alaric tampered with the memories cause he didn't like how I mourned over Stefan disappearing to his new life. I guess Stefan doesn't regret anything but I do. I regret letting him go I regret loving Damon I regret everything! I just can't put into perspective how much I love Stefan and despise Damon! I just want the gloss on the memories to go away so I can put the puzzle together and figure out why I loved Damon so much because right now there is still a fog upon parts of the memories. I also can't believe how everyone is coping so well with Bonnie being gone I mean to this day I still love/miss her so much! I wish I could talk to her from beyond the grave to tell her how Caroline is going nuts without her around. Caroline may not be the sharpest knife in the drawer but it's for god damn sure she's never lost anyone as important as Bonnie. I just really need answers! I could ask Alaric but he's busy at the moment, I could ask Stefen but he's god knows where and Caroline is being very spazy lately so really I don't know what the hell to do... TO BE CONTINUED


	3. Chapter 3

If I Had Chosen Stefan 3

Finally almost all of the gloss had gone away and I remember something that was compelled away from me! Damon was in my bedroom one night and he had said "I love you but you can't know that so forget what I just said and forget that I was here" or some crap like that and I guess when I turned It came back but I had never thought of it. Stefan always said he loved me right away no hesitation and that's what I'm looking for. I just wish he would come back but maybe he's moved on and my obsession is now pointless but either way I know somewhere deep down he still thinks about me or at least I hope. Damon is more poetic but only when he wants to be which is like never but another thing is why am I stressing over a dead guy!!! Am I just secretly in love with him and my conscious mind just doesn't know it!? I wish I could figure this out it's so confusing and it hurts to think about it. I tried to talk to Alaric no dice he won't talk so I'm hopeless! Why can't Stefan come back and him an I live happily ever after like in fairy tales... TO BE CONTINUED


	4. Chapter 4

If I Had Chosen Stefan 4

All of my memories are back and Stefan is too! I was almost screaming with joy when I saw him but the look on his face when he saw me was quite unpleasant I thought he wanted to see me but apparently he was here to see Caroline! I'm so angry that he would do that and for Caroline really? I just want the old Stefan back the one that would kiss me and play football. One thing that makes me fall for Stefan more was the conundrum that happend before Alaric compelled me Damon snapped Jermeys neck but thank god he was wearing the Gilbert ring or eternal life or something like that. I just want Stefan to notice me. I want him to see that I'm the one for him not _Caroline!_ Just give me back my old life where I'm not a Vampire where I'm a normal human that never met Damon he's an ungrateful bloodsucker who doesn't deserve to see the light again... TO BE CONTINUED


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